Hi Charles,
we know each other from outside this list, through your work on educational free softwares (I'm from the OLPC France crew).
I think it's perfectly fine to be friend (like in "true friend") with people having different values. I'd even go further and say it would be insane to be surrounded by like-minded people...that's why we have this discussion: lists of people who don't necessarily value the same priorities and who don't share the same point of view.
That said, I totally disagree with you, in a friendly manner :)
(1) I don't use Facebook and I'M FINE. Like many others. I do have friends, I chat online, I socialize, I read the news, I'm not an obscure nerd, lost in his paraverse.
(2) Facebook is a teenager in the Internet history. Not a baby, but not an adult. Some people like to educate raging teenagers, some prefer to avoid them. I avoid FB as I don't like to give to much attention to systems that do things in a way I 100% disapprove.
(3) I believe the strategy of "changing FB from FB" is a myth. Can anyone give an example of something she did on FB that resulted in a change in Facebook's policy? When people managed to change Facebook, it was not because their were on Facebook, but because they spent time and money *outside FB* to make them heard.
So I'm fine with my friends being on FB but (1) I don't let them say "It's the only way to stay connected to your classmates", (2) I urge them to remember Myspace and the likes and to remember behemoths can die, and (3) I challenge their "trojan horse strategy" illusion.
Now, as a group of free software hacktivists, I do think we have a responsability to pave the way and to show that we can make a better internet but not using things we disapprove.
We can more effectively change Facebook by not using it.
Best,